Nooooooooooooo!!!!!

I was so sad when I heard the news, David Archuleta, Utah's native son, came in second place. Tragedy. Actually I never watched an episode of this seasons show. Or last seasons, or the one before that, or the one before that. The only ones that are worth watching are the first few episodes wherein the bad singers who actually think they are good singers perform for simon, paula, and randy. Does it bother anyone else that simon is consistently the only one on the show with an original thought? Their season planning meeting must go something like this:

Simon: (eastenders british accent) Thank you all for coming, lets get this atrocity moving.

Randy: Yo, Dawg, it's been so long.

Simon: *sigh*

Paula: (laugh-crying hysterically) I had to clean up the diarrhea! I need help!

Simon: *sigh*

Seacrest: (holding pen as a microphone) This is set to be an amazing meeting. We have the all the big players here tonight, with a special guest appearance from (squinting, looking for cue cards) Dammit, who is our special guest?

Simon: *sigh*

Paula: Why do we have to have these meetings so early? I was in bed, my neck! Whats that buzzing noise?

Randy: Yo Dawg, thats the phone.

Paula: Where is my assistant to answer the phone? I have been asked to choreograph for the Bratz movie! I need help!

Simon: *sigh* We have gotten some good work done today. Ryan, I thought I told you that Neil Sedaka was not going to be here...

Seacrest: (touching flag lapel pin) Seacrest Out!

Randy: (taking fern leaves out of Paula's mouth) Yo Dawg! this ain't your house!

Paula: Where am I?

Simon: *sigh*

At least thats how I imagine it in my head. I dont know what worries me more, the fact that I imagine it, or the fact that it is so believable.

What worries me even more is the fact that Dick Cheney, Don Rumsfeld, Justice Antonin Scalia were all buddies during the Nixon administration? They apparently thought that the office of the Executive had lost some of it's powerful luster. Old news but just as interesting, they still pal around. And you thought it was dangerous to go hunting with the Vice-President.

(and yes, I know that's Ford in the middle)